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Breakfast For Dessert?!?

The best beer dessert of all time is a beer float with real vanilla ice cream and Founders Breakfast Stout.
by Eddie Glick

I like my beer like my women: pale, strong, full-bodied, and extremely bitter.
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First off, I have a confession to make: I don’t like root beer floats. Before you brand me a communist, please let me explain. Although I don’t like root beer floats, I love their ingredients. And there’s only two of ’em: vanilla ice cream and root beer.

My favorite flavor of ice cream is, in fact, vanilla. And I cannot stand it when someone says “Vanilla’s not flavor!” To me, that’s like saying, “Pilsner’s not a beer style!” Because vanilla ice cream—like a pilsner—when done right—with real fucking vanilla beans, full-fat cream, and only a hint of sugar—is incredible. Conversely, vanilla ice cream done wrong … you’ve got the ice cream equivalent of a Miller Lite, if we keep going with that pilsner metaphor.

And I love root beer. Done right. And when it comes to root beer, the best of all time throughout the universe in perpetuity is Sprecher Root Beer. Those who disagree either haven’t tried it or are liars. That’s it, don’t try to argue, don’t even open your mouth unless you’re going to vigorously agree with me. It’s that fucking good.

So, needless to say, I like those two ingredients so much that I want to enjoy them on their very own merits. Mixing them doesn’t create a synergy of flavors for me. It adulterates them. It adulterates them to the point that when I was a kid and all my school acquaintances got root beer floats, I would get a mug of root beer and a dish of vanilla ice cream. Not shitting you. Pure truth.

All that being said, the best beer dessert—maybe even the best dessert, period—I have ever had is a scoop of real vanilla ice cream in a big-ass mug of Founders Breakfast Stout. Maybe it’s because I loved malts as a kid, and the massive maltiness of the stout mixed with the ice cream reminded me of simpler times, when I lived with my parents and I had none of the soul-crushing responsibilitiess adults face every day … which can’t be true because I still live with my parents (but now I have the basement all to myself!) and I can’t think of any responsibilities other than maintaining the Harsh Mistress, also known as BeerDorks.com. So maybe it’s the gorgeous fresh coffee aroma and taste of Breakfast Stout, the roastiness playing off the sweetness of the ice cream, the heavy chocolate notes countering the unique earthiness of the vanilla beans. Or maybe it’s just the wopping shot of alcohol mixed with ice cream. I’m sure it’s all a rich tapestry.

Comments

I beg to differ. The best beer dessert out there is Southern Tier's Creme Brulee Stout. No ice cream needed.

posted by Franz | August 10, 2009, 2:00 PM

Hmmm ... too French.

posted by EddieGlick | August 10, 2009, 6:19 PM

Very bizarre. I often tell people I don't like vanilla ice cream, nor do I care for root beer, but I go nuts for root beer floats. Yes, it helps tremendously when you have a high fat ice cream freckled with lots of vanilla bean matter afloat in a craft brewed spicy root beer.

While the Founder's Float I'm sure is great, that beer's too tasty to taint with ice cream.
Cheers.

posted by Brian Yaeger | September 2, 2009, 5:19 PM

What’re The Dorks Drinkin’?
Nigel’s drinkin’ New Glarus Brewing Company Dancing Man Wheat 9/2/10 8:58 pm

Eddie’s drinkin’ Bell's Brewery, Inc. Two Hearted Ale 9/2/10 8:55 pm

Kaitlyn’s drinkin’ Dundee Brewing Dundee Honey Brown 9/2/10 7:48 pm